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Monday, August 27, 2012

A New Chapter Starts. Part 4


Over the next couple of weeks, Billy tells me and Adam all about the wild love affair that he and David are having. 

“I couldn’t be happier,” he says one morning while buttering his toast. Adam shoots me a glance and kicks me under the table.

Adam and I am so happy for him but I become perplexed when Billy won’t introduce him or even bring him home for us to meet. We are not sure that David even exists.

Billy dances out of the room eating his toast and I turn to Adam and say “Ow!”

Bill slides into the kitchen and slips into the seat that was just occupied by Billy. He leans into Adam and I with his elbow on the table. “Tom and I have met David and he is just lovely.” Bill tells a story about the night that David and Billy met at the center. 

According to Bill it turns out that he and David almost have a thing but that Billy swooped in and grabbed David when he was about to make his final move.

David it turns out is an ex marine that looks like George Michael from Wham. Adam and I look at each other.

Bill reminds me of and looks a lot like Charles Nelson Reilly. Now add severe buck teeth and a bigger lisp and you have Bill. Bill pours himself a bowl of cereal. He makes a face when he sniffs the milk in the carton but carries it along with his bowl into the living room.

Later that morning after everyone has gone to work; Adam and I climb to the roof. I have paused from looking for a job. Everywhere I go, they don’t need anyone or they just hired someone. Today we will spend hours up there getting sun. It’s a quick trip up through the trapdoor in the roof in Tom’s bedroom at the back of the house.

We learn to be quiet, because every day there is someone new sleeping in Tom’s bed.  While he is at work, Tom lets his “dates” from the night before, wake at their leisure. 

When Tom is approached randomly by us about what he does for a job, he skirts around the issue. Every morning he sneaks out the front door wearing a tie and carrying a briefcase. Even Bill doesn’t know what he does. Adam and I begin or quest to get an answer and question everyone. 

We even try to follow Tom one day but he becomes wise and gives us the slip.

Adam and I joke that Tom aka “Leatherman” is a mild mannered accountant by day but keeps bad guys in a “Sling” at night. Bill almost kills himself with laughter when he overhears our scenario. ‘That’s hysterical,” he says sounding like Sylvester the cat. The spit even sprays off his tongue when he says it.

Bill is gross, weird, not smart, sad and slightly dumpy. As much as I torture him I regard Bill as my lifesaver and I find a protective place in my heart for him. I would never let him know this but I show him in other ways. I am Bills ear when someone has lead him on all night and then leaves him flat at last call.

This becomes a nightly conversation. Bill weeps at the foot of my bed while I listen. “I just want to be loved,” lisps Bill.

To be continued……



Geoffrey Doig-Marx holds all written and electronic rights to his writing "A Day in the Life". It can not be reprinted in part or whole without his written consent. 

Monday, August 20, 2012

A New Chapter Starts Part 3


When I threaten to rip Bills balls off by reaching down his throat, he steps quickly from the shower. I open the curtain and point one finger at him. “This will never happen,” I say. “But I,” Bill stammers. “I’m not playing,” I snap back and point at the door “Get the fuck out of this bathroom.”

With that said, Bills head drops forward and he skulks out of the bathroom.

This scenario will repeat itself again and again with both Bill and his roommate Tom. The result is the same. I have to give it up to them for believing that it will happen but it is a clear cut case of the definition of insanity.

Their third roommate, Adam is very quiet and stays mostly to himself. We become fast friends and share similar experiences dealing with Tom and Bill. One of our favorite things to do is waiting while Bill is taking a shower, then we go on the roof and lean in through the bathroom skylight. All we have to do is say “Hello,” and Bill jumps and runs in place. Scaring him becomes a weekly treat for us.

Tom and Bill go out almost every night to bars dressed in leather gear. The parade of losers that they bring home becomes a daily walk of shame for us to view over breakfast.

There is something fun about watching a grown man with ass less chaps trying to act nonchalant as he pours himself a cup of coffee and nibbles on toast. Tom and Bill never see their tricks off, so it becomes something that Adam and I have to do. I offer more than one pair of pants to them to help them maintain their dignity.

Adam and I develop a rating system and a secret code so we can talk about the trick in front of him without him knowing or feeling bad. If the guy is a total ass we will just speak in easy to decode “bad pig Latin.”

One night Bill brings home another twink named Billy, who needs a place to crash for a couple of months. He has come to Albany after leaving home in Lake George. He talks like a Kennedy and actually one corner of his mouth curves up when he laughs. It is clear from the first moment we meet him that he comes from a family of privilege.

Billy’s sister is a fashion model with an eating disorder. She lives in New York City and is battling anorexia. He tells us that she actually sews rocks in her clothing so she will weigh more at the doctor’s office.

Billy, Adam and I now become a close knit clique that waits by the skylight to scare Bill when he showers.

He is quick to pick up our secret code and rating system. There are no extra rooms so Billy and I share a common bedroom wall. We communicate along with Adam at night by knocking out another secret code. We soon rough shod over Tom and Bill. They go crazy trying to decode what the hell we are talking about.

Bill and Tom throw parties in the living room that is the size of a small ballroom. People who don’t make it home end up spending the night.

You can go to sleep and you find someone trying to climb in your bed. In the beginning it’s a little shocking but we soon create a code to throw the bum out of the house. A couple of mornings I find out that Adam and Billy have not always thrown out late night visitors found in their beds.

Billy comes home one night and tells us that he is “Hopelessly in love with a guy named David,” that he met at the center.

to be continued…………….


Geoffrey Doig-Marx holds all written and electronic rights to his writing "A Day in the Life". It can not be reprinted in part or whole without his written consent. 

Monday, August 13, 2012

A New Chapter Starts Part 2


I start to sleep wherever I can and my friends start to pass me around. 

I sleep on different floors, in hallways, in people’s yards, anywhere I am invited to sleep, I sleep. 

The nights that I am on my own I wander through the streets of Albany. I nod off sitting on people’s porches. I vow that “Someday I will have a home that I can call my own.”

Friends of Friends even volunteer. I sleep on a couple’s floor so they can go out on a date. They leave me in charge of their daughter who is one at the time. This is where I start to have a belief that “Angels” appear and do good deeds to help you get through rough times.

The husband of the couple is a horrible racist who refers to me as “Queer as a three dollar bill.” He is a chain smoker with a Nazi Tattoo on his upper arm. They live over the pharmacy on the corner of Lark and Western and show me such kindness. I get to stay with them for a whole week. So I am able to stay somewhere a little more consistent. 

They feed me, give me cigarettes and let me shower. I listen to him say horribly racist comments every time he looks out the window and across the street to the “poorer” section of Albany. 

I spend my days looking for a job, any job that I can do I will. I start to clean people’s houses to make any money I can. I meet three rich spoiled college girls who hire me to clean their apartment on a weekly basis. They have no idea that I am sleeping on the streets. One of the girls holds her nose and mouths the words “He stinks” when I am scrubbing their toilet. I pretend that I don’t hear her.

I am making $40.00 to clean their home. The list they leave consists of scrubbing floors, cleaning bathrooms, dusting, vacuuming, washing and folding clothes, making beds and cleaning their rooms. The whole job takes me hours. When I am done and I survive the finger test (this is where one of the girls walks around the house and wipes her finger over everything that I have cleaned) I am told I will be paid “Next Time.”

I don’t want to tell them my living situation because I am afraid that I will lose the job.
My friend Rich tells me that I can sleep at his house on the floor of his room for a couple of nights. I am told that if I hear his father come home that I am to make no noise at all. He says that his father will kill him if he finds out that someone is staying there. 

It is just Rich and his Dad living in the apartment. His Dad was recently divorced. The house is filthy and newspapers are everywhere.

This is the lowest I have ever felt in my life. I spend so much time silently crying when I realize this is my life.   

One day while Rich is out of the house I lay down on the floor of the kitchen after I have opened the stove and turned on the gas. Rich returns home because he has forgotten something and finds me.

My suicide attempt has not worked and Rich tells me I can no longer stay on his floor, so I am back on the streets. 

My friend Anna sees me on the street and invites me to come to her house. Her Father is rich and divorced. She will let me hide in her basement.

Anna sneaks me into her house where I can take a shower. She makes me some food and takes my filthy clothes and throws them into the washer. She gives me a pair of sweats and a t-shirt to wear until my clothes are clean.

We listen to Simon and Garfunkel, Jodi Mitchell and Anna’s all time favorite band “The Who.” We dance around her room and when she gets called to dinner she tells me to hide under the bed. 

It doesn’t take long for Anna’s father to get wise to what’s going on. Anna makes a plea to him as if she just found a puppy on the street she wants to keep.

The answer is “No!” and I am once again back on the streets.

It is several days before I return to the Gay Community Center looking for any help that I can get.

Bill at the front desk listens to my story as I sob uncontrollably. He is moved and explains to me that he has an apartment down on Madison Place that I can stay at. He has two roommates named Adam and Tom and he has four bedrooms and two baths.

It is an hour later when he tries to step into the shower that I realize what he expects in return for his help.

To be continued……..

Geoffrey Doig-Marx holds all written and electronic rights to his writing "A Day in the Life". It can not be reprinted in part or whole without his written consent. 

Monday, August 6, 2012

A New Chapter Starts Part 1


So what happens next? I immediately began screaming for Leo as I reach into Crawford’s cage. Blood leaks out of the corner of her mouth and her head twists around as I lift her. Tears begin to fall from my eyes as I slide to the floor.

Leo is at my door and by my side in less than one minute. The rest of the kids from the group home quickly climb out of bed and gather in the hallway outside of my door. The kids, who were awoken in the middle of the night and ran to my door, were in pajamas and shorts.

While I explain to Leo what happened, he begins to pace back and forth punching the wall. The counselor, who got stuck doing overnight this week, runs up the back stairs and pushes through the kids to get to my room.

She stands and stares at me with her hand on the jamb. She is trying hard to catch her breath. The counselor stares at me because I am sobbing; blubbering and have blood is all over my shirt and I am holding a close to dead rat. “What the hell is…….?” The counselor starts to say when Leo takes his arm, and sweeps everything off of Jonathan’s dresser.

“I’ll kill that Mother Fucker! Leo screams.

Leo leaves in search of Jonathan. Instead of going back through the group home, he storms down my front stairs. The bell jingles and jumps, when it slams closed.

Leo vows on the way out, that he would not come home until he finds him. The kids from the group home stand in my doorway with their mouths open, as I cry over Crawford who is now dead in my hand.

I hold her to my chest and rock back and forth. She was all that I had, and she was now gone.

Jonathan is found by Leo as he hides in the bushes behind the group home. Leo grabs him by the back of the neck and once again, gets dragged back into the woods. The police and neighbors are attracted to Jonathan’s screams and he is found beaten and tied to a tree.

Leo is arrested and the court sends him to Juvenile Hall where he allegedly stabs a nurse to death on the grounds.

Jonathan is removed from the group home Independent Living apartment and sent back into the system. He will end up at another group home in the system and no one will read his records. He will find that he has a clear slate.

I will be sent to live in the apartment of the man from Africa. A counselor calls a cab for me and I pack it with all my worldly belongings. I am given cab fare and a check to give the man for rent and that’s it. The next day I am starving and eat a little of this and a little of that out of any food that I can find in the apartment. My hopes are that he won’t see I am stealing food.

Two weeks later I am on the streets. I spend my days sleeping in a Laundromat. That way I look like I am waiting for my clothes to dry. At night I am in Washington Park hiding under bushes. The rats are bold and will walk over the top of you to go where they are headed. I spend most of the nights wide awake

to be continued……


Geoffrey Doig-Marx holds all written and electronic rights to his writing "A Day in the Life". It can not be reprinted in part or whole without his written consent. 


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